Relationships demand hard work to be demanding. Conflicts will arise, and there will be differences. But it all comes down to how you deal with them. If you communicate with each other properly, you can move past any hardship together. 

Sometimes, even if you understand each other, you cannot resolve a particular issue. If this is ever the case, the best decision is to seek couples therapy. Is your partner unsure about it? Well, it’s quite common for people to be hesitant, skeptical, or even resistant. So, don’t worry.

Here’s how to start the conversation if your partner isn’t sure about couples therapy.

1. Understand Their Hesitations First

Before encouraging your partner to join therapy, know why they’re hesitant. Some common concerns include:

1. Worrying that therapy will reveal the relationship is “failing”
2. Fears about being judged or blamed
3. Concerns over cost or time commitments
4. Past negative experiences with therapy

Approach this with compassion, not criticism. A simple question like “What feels uncomfortable about the idea?” can open the door. When you truly understand this, you’ll be better equipped to address it.

2. Redefine What Therapy Really Is

Many people picture couples therapy as a last resort, but it is really not. It definitely doesn’t mean your love is falling apart. You should know that therapy isn’t just for a crisis. In fact, it is for growth. So, what you need to do first is reframe what couples therapy is to you. Think of it as:

• A way to improve communication skills
• A safe space to resolve recurring issues without escalating conflict
• An opportunity to strengthen the partnership, not “fix” it

Remember, always look at the positive outcomes. Think about how couples therapy will deepen your connection and improve your teamwork. Ultimately, this will shift the narrative from “we’re broken” to “we’re investing in us.”

3. Emphasize Teamwork, Not Blame

One reason partners don’t go for therapy is the fear of being “ganged up on”. Assure your partner that you are not doing it to prove them wrong. Instead, express that you want to work together to make the relationship stronger.

You can say:

“I don’t see this as any of us being the problem. I see it as us learning new tools so we can both feel happier in our relationship.”

This reassurance can reduce defensiveness and encourage openness. They’ll feel more at ease when they know you want growth and togetherness.

4. Start Small and Suggest a Trial

To couples, therapy also feels like it’s a big commitment. If this is the reason for you, we suggest you try just one couples therapy session together first. Present it as an experiment rather than a permanent decision. Say something like:

“How about we go once, just to see how it feels? If it doesn’t work for us, we don’t have to continue.”

Often, experiencing a session before saying yes to a lengthy therapy plan is beneficial. After all, it helps partners see its value more than any explanation could.

5. Share Your Own Feelings

Focus on how you feel and what you want from it. Using “I” statements prevents your partner from feeling blamed. For example:

• I feel like we sometimes talk past each other, and I’d love to learn better ways to communicate.
• I care so much about us, and therapy feels like one way I can invest in our future together.

Make them sit with you and have a heart-to-heart on why you feel going for therapy is a good idea. This approach makes it clear that therapy is all about reconnecting.

6. Respect Their Pace

Change doesn’t happen overnight, and not everyone progresses at the same speed. Also, you have to be a team player in couples therapy. If your partner still seems hesitant, be mindful of it.  Avoid ultimatums or pressure. Instead, keep the conversation open-ended and respectful. Let them know the invitation is there whenever they feel ready. 

In the meantime, you can also pursue individual therapy to process your own feelings. It helps you regulate your thoughts and gives strategies for your relationship.

Did You Know?According to a report, 42,933 divorces were recorded in Canada during the year 2020. Many of these cases exist because couples give up on hope. Don’t be one of them. Small conflicts are in every relationship. Handle them with maturity and give your love the support it deserves.

While couples think going to a clinic for therapy is a hassle, it has proven to be helpful. There’s something powerful about being in the same room together. In-person sessions also allow the therapist to pick up on nonverbal cues like body language, eye contact, or small shifts in posture. These say a lot about how partners are really responding to one another.

Many also think going for a retreat, listening to podcasts, or virtual sessions can be equally beneficial. However, in-person couples therapy offers a level of immediacy and connection that’s hard to replicate. Here’s how:

• The shared physical space helps couples stay more present
• They engage with fewer distractions
• Build trust through genuine, real-time interaction
  

Inner Voice Therapy offers in-person couples therapy in Mississauga. You can book your session today to start building stronger, more connected relationships.

Conclusion

Assure your partner that couples therapy is a choice and not a compulsion. And it won’t discourage them. In fact, it will encourage them to be hopeful about the relationship. Give them space to understand that it will equip them with patience, empathy, and clarity for healthier communication.

Seeking therapy is all about building a stronger foundation for the future. Even if your partner needs time, your willingness to show up for the relationship sends a powerful message of care and commitment. So, you should be compassionate and patient till they’re ready.